From the Helm – Wednesday, January 06, 2010

4 AM – Peaceful waters all night.  After brief stops in Porto Trombetas, Oriximina and Juruti dropping off passengers, we’ve made good time.  Our ETA for arrival in Parintins is set for around 2 this afternoon.  Our flight to Manaus leaves at 5, tomorrow morning.

- I slept from 8 last night until my coffee was delivered just a bit ago.  Good, sound sleep.

I look forward to seeing Phillip and Matthew in the morning.  It’s good to be heading back for awhile. William will join us in the USA next week.  These young men are a joy to me and their mother.  A true joy…

-   This has been a different sort of venture than many of the past. I don’t recall feeling towards a community and people as I do towards Inaja and the Wai-Wai.  As I left them, it was an odd sensation of leaving home and family in a unique space and time, only to be reunited with home and family in yet another unique space and time – leaving home to go home.  It’s beautiful in a way that escapes definition; so, I won’t venture to try.  I trust God allows me to introduce the Boys to all of this one day.  It would be good, indeed…

- Our time together is about up.  The Team has seen so much; experienced so much.  At this time, we know only a little regarding what we’ve ventured through. God will reveal more to each of us as He unfolds our days.  I look forward to seeing and hearing of such enlightenments as they become clear.  What a deal this has been.  What a deal, indeed…

I’m grateful to You, Lord, for the breadth and depth of these days.  I’m grateful for Your wisdom, protection, provision and grace through it all.  Lord, I’m humble before You this day.  Thank You for Your consideration of me.  It is truly humbling, indeed…

- From the Helm will continue from elsewhere, on another day, as God leads…

From the Helm – Tuesday, January 05, 2010

2 AM – After a long shower and a good meal, I slept amazingly well.  I am rested for the day to come.

- Marciano and his team of pilots ate aboard last night.  It was good to feed and house some of them aboard the Beatriz in the same way they cared for us in Inaja.  These are good men.  To bring us to and from their home is a dangerous and intense undertaking.  I am grateful for each one of them.

- We are scheduled to depart for Parintins after breakfast this morning, delivering Braginha to his home in Aboim along the way.  I will have to sit with him for a bit, explaining that we will no longer be able to continue his monthly financial support.  The offerings for his ministry have not been provided for by churches back home for more than 4 years.  AMOR simply hasn’t the funding to continue in this manner.  There are other issues with Braginha that have led me to make this decision.  We will give him title to the AMOR/Cesar; a couple months continued support and continue to pray for him.  I wish him well and feel certain God will provide if and as He chooses in the future.

It is unfortunate that promised support for several of our pastors has not been provided.  AMOR has assumed these commitments for several years now.  I see little way of continuing to take up this slack much longer unless God shows differently.  We send more than US$ 3,500.00 each month over the amount that actually comes in for these pastors.  Their work is anointed and I have no complaint regarding the monthly challenge to meet their needs.  However, it is becoming increasingly difficult to divide up the dwindling funds that arrive.  God will keep those He desires to keep and the others will find His provision elsewhere.  I know this in my heart.  It’s the way it is…

1 PM – We were underway at 8 o’clock.  The canoes broke off from us and headed back up the rapids.  I watched until they left sight.  My heart is heavy.  God permitting, I’ll be with them again, soon.

- We met with Braginha a couple hours ago before taking him back to Lake Aboim.  He told us he had felt this change coming long ago.  He is not concerned with the future.  He is certain God will provide.  He is correct in his assumption.

We signed the boat over to him with the assurance we still remain ready to help him in any way possible, in whatever ministry God leads him to engage in.  He has much to contemplate regarding his person and life.  I’ve been there myself a number of times.  It is all good in the end if he will but seek and follow – one step at a time.  All good in the end, indeed…

We are now headed to Porto Trombetas at a good clip.  The Beatriz is running flawlessly.  It’s good to be aboard her, once again.  After a brief stop for a meeting in Trombetas, we will head on to Oriximina then, Parintins. 

At this point in time, our ETA for arrival will be this time tomorrow.  We’ll confirm the actual time when we get there…

From the Helm – Monday, January 04, 2010

6 PM – We arrived back at the Beatriz a couple hours ago.  What a ride…

The ride “down” was as surreal as the ride trip “up”.  The rapids and falls were so violent and shallow in places, the canoes had to lower by rope, backwards – a thrill best experienced than described...

The Wai-Wai’s live in a region of abundant fisheries, prey and natural beauty.  The sights are breathtaking.  The privilege of watching these people live out their daily lives has given me a new understanding of simplicity.  They want for nothing for they never ask for no more than they need.  When they receive their daily sustenance, their response is one of gratitude to their God.  They take nothing for granted and give freely of what they’ve collected for their own families. They are truly grateful for each day God allows them – something I see little of outside my personal world.

- These past days, I’ve experienced a number of things I don’t fully understand.  Conversations and observations that have yet to divulge their full meaning and application to my life.  I look forward to the continued unfolding of what God made available to me in all this  I’ve been blessed in a special way and am profoundly grateful.

- On January 2^nd and 3^rd, several of us went to Mapueira by invitation of their Pastor (Fernando) and the Grand Chief of the Wai-Wai, Elizeu. The journey was another 8 hours up the Mapueira River from Inaja.

The river quickly narrowed and the falls stretched for hours at a time.  Immediately upon departure from Inaja, we battled Paradise Fall for two hours.  Then after a short break of smooth water, we entered the 3 hour engagement of Mare’s Fall.  The channel shrunk to less than 30 yards across.  White-capping waters compressed by high walls of granite and overhanging trees and vines.  What an awesome sight to behold.

We finally arrived in the Capital city of Mapueira at 3 in the afternoon.  The Grand Chief had prepared a royal reception for his guests.  Their new Year’s celebration was still in full swing.  We were taken to the Great House where some 500 Wai-Wai were sitting, dancing and eating from a bountiful spread of tapioca bread, taper, paca, capivara and smoked fish.  We were served as the men and women dance around the great room in full native garb.  I was given the knee joint of the taper on a clothe made of tapioca.  Greg felt fortunate he was too busy filming to enjoy the feast. After the fruitless search for anything other than skin and bone in my “knee”, I felt tempted to grab a disposable Kodak and act busy myself…  It was all good.  The dancing went on for 2 hours before we were whisked away to a meeting with the “powers”.

We met in the church building.  A building that seats some five-hundred.  It is a 110 X 50 foot structure.  Massive by anyone’s standards.  The Grand Chief and his aids sat with the pastors, Luiza, Edno and me for another long hour.  I listened as Elizeu spoke of Wai-Wai history and their needs.

The missionaries came in 1950, clothing the population with the Word and covering for their bodies.  They remained until 3 years ago.  Now, other than a visit once or twice a year, the Wai-Wai’s are left to themselves.  I could sense the air of a “lost child” as he described the great loss of the missionary presence among them.  I was saddened yet encouraged they were finally on their own to use the spiritual tools that had been planted in their hearts.

Elizeu asked for many commitments from me that I was unable to make; things I do not feel led to do – mainly, abandon the lower clans to tend to the Capital City.  God has drawn me to the forgotten, not those who’s needs are being met.  Mapueira has more than they need and seek less of Him who provides.

Missionaries such as Irene Benson gave their entire lives to these people.  The fruits of their labor abound.  They built houses and lived among the people of Mapueira for more than 50 years.  As the result, this is a Nation of Christians.  They have blocked entry of all other denominations, save those evangelical in nature and theology. They’ve created a protective bubble for themselves.  This spiritual commonality seems surreal to me.  It is a good and unique thing to experience.  Practically all of this nation profess Christ as their Savior.  It is an uncommon thing in the world I live in – exciting and comforting…

After a long evening at the church, we retired to Irene’s old homestead.  It is kept almost as a shrine to her – her presence was almost tangible.  We ate rice and sardines at 11 PM.  I was exhausted from the trip and overexposure to the sun.  I’m burned rather badly…

- We departed early on the morning of the 3^rd.   My mind and heart were full and contemplative the whole way back to Inaja.  By the end of the scorching trek home, I had come to see clearly the plight of this Nation.  These are a people who have been blessed to hear the Word and accept it, almost collectively.  These are a people who have the Bible in their own language.  These are a people whose eternity is anchored in Christ.  However, these are a people who thirst for understanding of the Word’s application to their personal lives.  Their thirst for clarification of what they read in scripture is profound.  It is reminiscent of the Ethiopian eunuch who was found by Philip on the roadside, studying scripture but lacking any understanding…

- My arrival back to Inaja was truly comforting.  I had come back home.  The evening was filled with conversation with Foracha and Marciano about my travels.  There was an almost childish jealousy in their demeanor. They’d not liked the fact we had taken of our time with them to visit a “strange land”.  I was both humbled and amused.  My love for them grew even deeper – our bond, stronger…

-  I was also met with the news our water and food supply would last only another 12 hours.  Our time here would be limited to that.  Departure was set for early this morning.

- Last night was a beautiful time of gift-giving and worship.  The people had us stand at the front of the church while one-by-one, they all came and adorned us with headdresses, bracelets and necklaces.  It was deeply moving.  Before the whole thing started, the Chief had come to me privately saying he had but one gift to give me.  I was left speechless when he presented me with the house on the river we’ve called our home for the past two years.  He declared that the house is no longer a house of the Wai-Wai.  It is now the house of Bill – Bill’s House!  My, my, my…  What an honor.  I now own a true piece of Eden…

- The peoples response to the teachings of  Brent, Greg, Mark and Ken confirms in my heart and soul these are a people hungry for the word.  Work among the children had never been undertaken.  VBS gave new life to these little ones.  They suddenly found themselves part of the larger tribe. 

The request for our continued presence here has touched me deeply. Van and Sherry were able to meet the physical needs of all who came to them.  Greg recorded every moment on miles of film.  I look forward to God’s clarification of the meaning in it all.  I look forward to it, indeed…

From the Helm – Still January 1, 2010

Greg, Luiza, Edno and I will be departing for Mapueira at 5 tomorrow morning.  This village is 8 hours upstream from here.  The remainder of our team will continue ministering, as He leads, in Inaja. God willing, we should re-join our family here, late Sunday.

This is the last written communication for the next 40 or so hours.  God bless all who follow along.  Your continued prayers and support are appreciated.  From the Helm will continue sometime on the 3^rd.  Take care…

From the Helm – Friday, January 01, 2010

8 AM - It’s been a festive morning.  The community danced and sang until the wee hours under the supervision of a gorgeous, full moon.  I must have been tired – I saw and heard little after 10 last night.  The boys hung my hammock under the house.  Its comforting contrast over the floor, coupled with a gentle breeze, was all I needed to bring in the New Year.

At about 9 this morning, 21 young people who accepted Christ throughout the year we baptized in the river.  It was quite a sight to see.  A number of these made their public professions of faith during Murray’s trip, this time last year.  It was a privilege to see the circle completed today.  A beautiful thing indeed…

11 AM – Filipino and a couple of the Wai-Wai men are dressing and preparing a wild boar for the open fire.  We’ve given a bunch of chickens and rice to compliment the pork and fish Ken’s team brought in yesterday.  I can taste it already!   It’s good to be among this people on this special occasion.  I could never have designed it this way.  God has been especially considerate of me this day.  I am grateful.

The ladies just finished touching up the body paint they applied to me yesterday afternoon.  It is one they designed last year as a gift to me.  The symbols represent “Man at Peace”.  I was deeply humbled by the gesture.  It is a symbol I plan to have permanently tattooed when I return home.  It will be a reminder to me of two pertinent things in my life: the peace God has made to permeate in my life and soul and the bond, now strong, He’s allowed me with this precious people.  Both, blessings of His kindness, mercy and grace.  Thank You, Lord, for this life You’ve allowed me.  Thank You for the privilege of Your presence.  Thank You for allowing me to realize just how special it all is…

3 PM – More dancing and more food.  Its all been good.  Lots of fellowship and discovery.

- I witnessed the making of the “pepper blend” this afternoon.  I’ve been sworn to “secrecy”.  What a deal it is…

- Seemingly, all that remains for this day is the rest of the day.  Medical saw several people.  As for the rest of the team, there has been but rest and participations with the Wai-Wai’s.  I danced a bunch myself…  Maybe a church service later this evening; maybe not.  It’s been all good, indeed…

From the Helm – Thursday, December 31, 2009

3 AM – Unbelievable…  Mere words will deny descriptive justice to what I’ve seen these past hours.  Since departing the Beatriz yesterday, we’ve ventured in to another world – another place and time.

For 8 hours we travelled through the ever narrowing channels of the Mapueira River.  The cliffs and rock formations becoming higher and more pronounced as we slowly pressed forward.  At each set of rapids and falls, the necessity of jump in and drag our mammoth canoes over the shallows, evolved from an occasional occurrence to the norm of things.

Tucans and macaws flew over us with the frequency of blackbirds back home.  I was amazed at the rocks rising from the waters.  They were magnificent in size and shape - some polished smooth, others jagged and menacing.  As our 5 canoes jockeyed for position between negotiations of the falls, we’d just look at each other, the sheer awe of it all was apparent in each face…

We finally arrived in Inaja at dusk, yesterday.  The entire community were standing or sitting on the great rock ledges as our canoes landed.  So good to see Foracha (the Chief) and all the rest.  We were welcomed royally.  This time, Marciano vacated two homes in order to accommodate our numbers and provisions – the hospitality of this people continues to deeply humble me.  I am so very grateful to be here among them once again…

The full-moon is casting perfect shadows off the trees from the east; the Southern Cross low on the southern horizon; Scorpio setting to the east; the sound of the rapids roaring in the background of my thoughts. Here I sit, overlooking the river – my mind and soul in total awe of it all. Thank You, Lord, for allowing this for me.  Thank You for safe passage to this place and people.  My, my.  Thank You for it all, indeed…

1 PM – It’s been a mellow morning.  We just got our generator up – now, we have communication with the rest of our universe.

- Just after dawn, all of us went to the “Rock” to bathe.  The water was warm.  I stayed in for almost an hour, chatting and letting the current relax me.  One of our members’ hammocks became soaked during our journey yesterday, so, I loaned him mine.  The floor for the night made the waters this morning truly relaxing.  A hammock tonight will be a welcomed relief…

- A few minutes ago, the Cacique of Mapueira arrived and requested a meeting with me.  He, Foracha, Marciano and I visited for a good few minutes before he asked what he’d come to ask.  He wants to take me up to Mapueira day-after-tomorrow to visit his people.  My immediate reaction was “yes”.  After discussing it with our team, my answer was confirmed.  Greg Brown, Edno, Marciano and I will depart at dawn on January 2^nd, spend the night and return the 3^rd, hopefully be dark…  I love it…………………

- It seems some folks back home became a little concerned the other day when I mentioned that “a couple of our team were not quite 100%”.  Well, what I said was what I meant.  Nobody was “sick”; they just had a few hours “not quite 100%”. Everyone is WELL!!

- Medical just finished for the morning.  VBS and teaching begins this afternoon.  All is in full swing.  How good it is…

- Preparations for New Years have begun all round us.  The women are making huge tapioca cakes and collecting fruits to make juices.  Ken is out with the fishing party in search for tomorrow’s food.  When he gets back, he’ll probably turn around and head out with the hunting party.  I feel certain his stories will be numerous and wild.  It’ll be fun to hear him tell about the whole deal.

From the Helm – Wednesday, December 30, 2009

4 AM – Sleep was sweet; uninterrupted.  The little hike yesterday probably helped…

The coffee tastes unusually good this morning.  The skies are starless.  Cloudy but crisp – low humidity.  I’m secretly hoping for rain all the way to Inaja.  We’ll see what happens…

8 AM – The canoes have arrived.  The journey begins……………..

From the Helm – Tuesday, December 29, 2009

4 AM – We arrived in Porto Trombetas an hour ago.  Braginha is nowhere in sight (of course he’s a bit hard to see in the dark…).  We’ve taken on ice for our chests, documentation for our entry and will wait till dawn to see what the deal is with our wayward pastor.

It was a smooth trip up the Trombetas River – good sleep for those of us not yet “on duty”.  I am rested.

- I received an email late last night that Stacy will not be joining us on the 11^th for our second trip.  This makes two that have found it not possible to make the trek.  I know the circumstances of their cancelations will be worked out in God’s wisdom and timing.  These things happen.  I’ll be left to deal with the financial ramifications when I return home.  These trips were at the absolute breakeven point, as they stood, with no cancellations.  This too, God has considered – my impute is neither needed nor advisable at this stage in the game. 

We have come thus far because God so led us.  We will stay and do until He leads otherwise.  As we live the days ahead, He will provide clarity.  It’s all I ask of Him. It’s all I desire and need…

6:20 AM – Braginha is nowhere to be found. We’ve set sail up the Trombetas.  We know our destination is north.  Hard to go wrong if we head that way.  Braginha will appear along the way when he appears.

It’s beautiful this morning.  Clear skies.  Clear mind.  Good to be alive...

11 AM – A few minutes ago, a lady on the bank of the river flagged us down.  We most always stop when this happens.  A she rowed her boat towards us, here came Braginha around the bend behind us.  Good to see him even if he did oversleep and miss us in Trombetas…  We took him aboard and helped the lady out with some gasoline at the same time.  We are now underway.  At least there’s someone now aboard who at least claims to know how to get to where we’re supposed to be.  The current information we now have is that the river is still very low and treacherous for the Beatriz.  We will go ahead and venture as far as is prudent.  The Wai-Wais are headed in our direction as we speak.  We should meet somewhere, some time in the night…

1 PM -  Just awhile ago, I sent an email to the participants on our next trip.  It has become clear to me that we should postpone that venture.  I’ve sought council and asked for God’s peace – this He has given me.  No regrets.  There was little to ponder.  I will visit with each of those not travelling when I’m able to return home.

- We are cruising at a breezlessly slow pace.  The Trombetas is unseasonable low -  Sandbars and beaches more abundant than water in the channel.  I’ve never had the privilege of seeing it like this before. Breathtakingly beautiful…

ETA for Cashoeira Porteira is estimated to be around dark, this evening. 

7 PM – Just had dinner.  We’re tired…

Arrived in Cachoeira Porteira at 3 this afternoon.  Then took an hour hike and canoe ride to Tawana to visit our friends there.  The rapids are so violent and exposed, we will probably have to portage at least three of the 5 on the way up tomorrow.  The canoes from Inaja have still not arrived leaving me to believe they’ve either had problems along the way or they weren’t able to come down this morning.  If they get here by 10 in the morning, we will still make Inaja by nightfall.  Just have to wait till tomorrow comes.

A couple of our team aren’t quite 100% today.  We have until tomorrow to mend or consider splitting the team between Inaja and Tawana.  Either way, it will be just the way it should be.  All are exited for the events tomorrow may bring…

- The river is beautiful.  Rocks exposed high above the water line.  I’ve never seen such a magnificent sight.  Maybe I lead a sheltered life and just don’t get out much for this is all amazing for me to behold.  Amazing, indeed…

From the Helm – Monday, December 28, 2009

5 AM – We picked up Edno at 3:45 this morning.  We enjoyed some quiet talks on the bow.  This guy is a dear friend to me.  I’m grateful God saw fit to crow our paths.  We both look forward to the days ahead.  Lots of one-on-one time.

The sun just rose off out starboard side.  The nights cruise was smooth and relaxing.  I was able to sleep until my coffee was slid under my hammock at Three.  What a way to wake up…

Our ETA for Parintins is estimated to be around 11 this morning.  All is on schedule; whatever that means…

9 AM – We had an informal “share-time” after coffee this morning.  We visited regarding just about everything.  It was a good time of fellowship.  Most of us have known each other through multiple years.  We had a good time looking back over the various trips and experiences God blessed us to have shared.  By the end of it, we all were right back where we started – grateful for where we are today; right here in the depths of the Valley, launched on yet another venture.  What a beautiful thing for all of us…

As I contemplate my life today, I am filled with gratitude.  He has granted me more than most I know.  I have a family that accepts me as I am.  Friends who are timeless.  Help, comfort, forgiveness and mercy; each, according to and abundantly matching the measure of my need.

Lord, I ask nothing of You this day because all my needs are meet.  I thank You, Lord, for such tender consideration of me.  You are my sufficiency, indeed…

12:30 PM – we are about to depart Parintins.  Luiza will continue on with us.  Pedro is in the middle of some mission business that requires his personal attention.  We picked up Edinelson to show the way.  Good to see him again…  Our departure from here should be within the next half-hour.  Rough seas today.  The Amazon is showing her stuff…

4 PM – We’ve been underway for a couple hours now.  We crossed to smoother waters.  I have no idea when we’ll arrive at rendezvous tomorrow.  Still have a stop in Oriximina and another in Porto Trombetas during the night to pick up our authorizations to enter the Wai-Wai Nation.  We did, however, receive word that we will probably be able to reach as far as Cachoeira Porteira in aboard the Beatriz – the water level has risen substantially.  This is good news if it be true.  Our canoe ride may be down to only an 8 hour trek.  We’ll see…

Everyone is packing the essentials for the morning.  Excitement is building…

6 PM – Well, I’ll try and send a final entry from aboard the AMOR/Beatriz tomorrow just before we set out for Inaja.  For now, the sun has set; the winds are still up a bit but settling.  Another night of travel for us.

All are well.  All are in good spirits.  All is good…

From the Helm – Sunday, December 27, 2009

6:40 AM – The team arrived on schedule.  All but Van and Greg’s suitcases made the flight – nothing we cannot do without…

The team is in good spirits.  So am I.  The Beatriz just started fired her engine.  We are underway.  How grateful I am for it all.  The time has finally arrived to sail deep in to the Valley.  What a deal, indeed…

From the Helm – Saturday, December 26, 2009

10 AM – The crew are slowly making there way aboard this morning.  We’ve about got the hot water straightened out.  My coffee was delivered at 6 and just a few minutes ago – all is well.

- The team should be on their way to Atlanta by now.  Maybe the weather back home will break enough not to slow their flights down.  We’ll see…

I’m looking forward to the rest of the day.  Still a few little things to do here and there.  Should have our sat-system up and tested, soon.  We are really going to try and be up on location among the Wai-Wai’s.  Hope it works.  If it doesn’t, no great loss.

- Our dispatcher was just here to review the Beatriz and make sure we are legal for departure in the morning.  Just a precautionary review, making sure our documentation “ducks” are in a row.  As usual, all is more than satisfactory.

7 PM –All seems to be in order.  I spoke with Brent earlier.  They are on their way to the airport in Memphis.  Van and Greg are the only “question marks” at this point.  Evidently, there’s lots of snow in Iowa…

Spoke with Mom and Dad as well.  19 degrees back home!!  My, my, my, what a difference a few thousand miles makes in the weather.  Here, its 90 degrees and 90 percent humidity, sun is shinning.  Wouldn’t even have to drink water if I had gills to process the air.

- The crew is all aboard.  Good to see each one.  Dinner was good, as usual.  Tomorrow, though, it will start looking prettier.  When the team arrives, the chef does it up more than right!

9 PM – Although the moon is but a half, it’s a beautiful half, indeed…

We’re at anchor on the Taruma River.  We arrived here a couple hours ago.  It’s peaceful and comfortable.  I think it’s time for a shower and bed.  4 o’clock will be here soon.

The sat system is up and running perfectly, as everything else seems to be. 

Lord, You’ve taken special care of us these days.  I thank You for each detail.  I thank You for each provision.  I thank You for the rest You have in store for me tonight.  Thank You for family and friends.  Thank You for it all…

From the Helm – Friday, December 25, 2009

6 PM – I slept soundly until around 6 this morning.  To have the Beatriz to myself was an experience I’d not had for some years.  I’m grateful for the privilege.  There was even enough coffee left from last night, I didn’t have to make any.  It was a relaxing morning, indeed.

- I called Mom, Dad and the Boy’s this morning to wish them all the best on this special day.  It was good to hear all their voices…  Dad said it snowed back home.  What a way to spend such a day as this.  Just an added thrill God provided along the way.

- It didn’t work out for Anderson and me to follow our Christmas tradition of cruising the downtown.  I still have the money we were going to spend on the food baskets. I’m confident there will be a need over the next days that will fit the amount perfectly though.  It’s amazing how all that works.

- The marina didn’t start coming to life until an hour ago.  People are returning from a day with family or whatever.  Christmas is celebrated at midnight on the Eve hear in Brasil.  They put on a pretty good feast with all the special dishes imaginable.  The Boys told me their Vovo (grandmother) did it up right for all of them.  I remember the spreads she would lay out on any given day.  She would pretty much fix everybody’s favorites, every meal.  I have sweet memories of all that.  Reflection is a good thing these days…

- At 4 this afternoon,   Luiza, Little Charlie and I sat down regarding his termination.  It was a good, long conversation.  He’s been with us since 1995, officially. We’ve actually treated him as family since 1991.  The discussions went well.  We will be out in the low-5 figures to settle all his workers rights through an out-of-court settlement.  It’s big but, it is the right thing to do.  We have another suit to defend in March brought by Hoseas.  It’s bogus.  I have no concerns.  Won’t bother myself with that deal till it arrives.  There are quite a few days to be lived between now and then.  Even now, God has it resolved.  No need for my involvement.

- I’m looking forward to another quiet night.  The crew begins checking aboard in the morning.  This will be the last night alone for a good many days to come.  I think I’ll have another cup of coffee and enjoy the breeze…

Thank You, Lord…  Thank You for such a special day on this Special Day of Yours.  Thank You for sending Your Son so long ago that I might be able to know You as I do.  Thank You for your tolerance of me.  Thank You for all things seen and unseen responsible for this joy in my soul.  But for Your Grace and mercy, I’d be blind to what I’ve seen this day.  Thank You for it all, indeed…

From the Helm – Thursday, December 24, 2009

11 AM – Finally home aboard the AMOR/Beatriz…  It’s been several days getting here – It’s good to be home…  The day is cloudy and muggy.  Maybe the rains will come and cool things down a bit. 

All seems to be in order for sail.  Still having a rotation in the crew members.  Some can go, and then they can’t go.  So, we’ll just ride the deal out till everybody settles.  We’ll have a good team in the end, when we need them to get underway.

- When we arrive in Parintins, Edno and Edinelson will be waiting for us to guide the Beatriz through the sandbars and rocks on the Trombetas River.  Even though the river system is rising about 8 inches a day, it’s still low enough to get you in to trouble if you don’t know it well.  At these low levels, sometimes you get in trouble even if you do know the rivers well…

- So, here I sit.  A good cup of coffee within reach.  Our crew has gone home for Christmas.  Vessel tenders are cruising all around, taking their staff home and bringing in “unlucky” reliefs for the weekend.  By late tonight, everyone going home will be home and there will scarcely be a ripple in the water.  Carlinho is next door, within earshot of the generators.  What a rare occasion to have the Beatriz all to my self.  I could get used to this…

As of yet, I have no particular plan for tomorrow.  Anderson and I have been looking for some food baskets to pass out downtown in the morning but, haven’t been able to find any as of yet.  I’m sure something will come up that will be just what we need to be doing.  Just have to wait and see.  There are a lot of hours between now and in the morning.  Something will come up, for sure.

6:45 PM – I guess I’ll shut down for awhile.  The crew finally came together about an hour ago.  For now, we are set to travel.

Anderson is here.  The cell phone system has been out since some lighting flashed around several hours ago.  It’s really good to be aboard.  A shower and some light reading are in order.  The generator should “hum” me to sleep after awhile.  It’s truly good to be here right now.  Thank You, Lord, for everything.

From the Helm – Wednesday, December 23, 2009

4 PM – The power went off about an hour ago.  It’s been raining off-and-on again day - Peaceful…  All seems ready for our Sunday departure.  Those things remaining involve paying our fuel bill and the like.

- Filipino has completed the purchasing.  The gearbox has been repaired.  Fortunately, the problem was as simple as replacing one of the intake hoses that was cracked.  Navigation, refrigeration and hydraulics have been reviewed, tested and approved.  Dinho will have the bus at the airport at 5:00 AM, Sunday, to pick up our folks.  All seems set, in as much as they can be.

I plan on moving aboard the AMOR/Beatriz in the morning.  “Trip mode” will be fully engaged when I step onboard. 

I look forward to a quiet Christmas on the water…

Just thinking…

In recent weeks and months, I’ve had a few things come to mind more frequently than usual – some of these chose to stick around more than others.  They deal with topics such as relationships, death, peace-of-mind, God’s will and the like.   I’ve simply pondered these things.  I don’t really know what I don’t know about it all and have never written, in-depth, about any of it.  By writing about them, I’ll be able to solidify some thoughts and discard others.  It’s a selfish endeavor.  One that will be relaxing for me.  I look forward to the exercise.

I may or may not mail any of it.  If I do, they will not be to our “list” under “From the Helm”, nor will they be posted to the AMOR Website.  I will send them only to those requesting them by replying to this mail.  If you don’t reply, you won’t be bothered with any of it.  If you do reply and I don’t get around to sending them, nothing will be lost or gained.  Fair enough?

From the Helm – Tuesday, December 22, 2009

 Yesterday and today kinda rolled together in to one - It rained steadily all day yesterday.  Was able to get all on my list done anyway.  I love the rain.  There is no painting going on aboard the AMOR/Beatriz.  So, let it rain…

- By midnight, I was on my way back from the airport.  The Boys went south.  The flights were all on-time.  I saw Iva, Kirby Bailey and the kids at the airport – what a surprise!  They were awaiting their flight to Santarem.  You never know who you will run in to along the way.  This earth has shrunk to the size of a matchbox…

On the way back, I stopped and got the teams airfare straighten out with TRIP Airlines.  The fare structure has change a bit due to the Dollar.  I’ve gotten used to the ever-slumping value of our home currency.  I don’t see this trend changing courses any time soon.  Those of us who are able to accept and adjust to it now, will be the better off for it later.  What is taking place in the USA continues impact our efforts down here.  The sad deal about it all is my people back home won’t feel the weight of a shattered Dollar until there is little possibility of correction.  Higher fuel prices at the pump will be the very least of our adjustments to a world we’ve chosen to ignore for so long…

Today, 4:00 PM – I just finished with the day’s business.  The AMOR/Beatriz will begin her fueling process in a bit.  As she was pulling out to cruise her some to make sure she’s mechanically fit for departure, the gear box quit responding properly.  The box’s oil is white (a sign of water where it shouldn’t be) – the mechanic is on the way…

After I receive word about the extent of the damages to our “little Lady”, I’ll try to take an early dinner and settle in for the night.

- The Boys arrived safely, sound and tired to their mother just a couple of hours ago.  I know it will be a sweet time down there for the next couple weeks.  It’s been a different sort of year with lots going on for them.  Some rest and family time should do them all some soothing good.

- I slept quite well last night.  Slumber hung on til almost 7 this morning.  I think my body is finally relaxing to the pace of the Valley – bedtime will come earlier and my 3:30 AM coffee will soon be the new, old norm, once again.

I spoke with Dad a little bit ago.  All is well on the home front.  What a blessing it is to be able to communicate freely over such distances.  I remember the day when we had no means whatever of touching base during our trip seasons.  Today, it’s as easy as picking up the phone or pressing “send” on a keyboard (somewhat expensive but, easy when we need to).

- I realize I live different sorts of days than many of those in this world.  I’m grateful God has channeled me in the directions He has.  I’m in no way special or unique but, the places and experiences I’ve been privy to are, indeed, special and unique to me.  I can’t begin to express my lack of understanding of much that goes on in the world around me.  However, I can very accurately express my gratitude for being some small part of it.  You see, it’s the identifiable parts that make up this unidentifiable whole of things.  I need conceptual skills only for the little sphere of which I’m part.  God’s big plan only involves me to the extent I am diligent not to assume a loftier role than what He places before me, each day – never more than in this day He has given me to live. 

I’m relieved God’s seen fit to give me no guarantee of any tomorrows.  This removes all need for glancing ahead of what He wants me to see, do and take in.  I can not very well glean anything if I’m skipping chapters in the book.  The unfolding of each page is where the amazement, thrills and ponderings lie.  Until He chooses to change things around, it’s just the way it’s supposed to be. I needn’t search for anything deeper.  I tend to lose my footing when I leave the shallows…

Thank You, Lord, for Your consideration of me.  Thank You for Your gentleness of touch in my life.  Thank You for considering me at all…

From the Helm – Sunday, December 20, 2009

 10:30 AM - Another morning slept in.  I must have been more tired than I thought.  Anderson met me for breakfast at 7:30, and then took me downtown for a meeting.  The morning went by surprisingly fast.

I spoke to Luiza a bit about our legal situation with Carlinho and Hoseas.  It is becoming clear the time to cut our losses in Manaus and move our operations to Parintins may be near.  To stay on here will require substantially more resources than to relocate further down-river.  Over the next month, our two small teams will allow us to check out airline and provisioning logistics from there.  I feel some changes just below the surface, on several fronts.  However, no decisions have to be made on it today.  So, I’ll just let the days unfold until clarity drives away the questions of the mind.  Luiza and I are scheduled to meet about it all over the next couple days. 

3:00 PM – It’s been a good day.  The boys and I just got back from lunch.  In a bit, they’ll probably head out on the town, leaving me to my coffee – it’s a win-win situation…

- God continues to give me the peace I’ve grown to seek and cherish in our trek together.  There are no storms brewing; no speculation or undue anticipation; nothing baffling.  But for His grace and mercy, it would all be quite different for me.  My memory is still fresh.  Maybe, that’s why my gratitude is so profound.  To wake up an amazed child each morning rather than the self-made victim of fruitless searching, is the difference He has made in it all.  A difference I could scarcely imagine living without today.

I thank You, Lord, for the hours You’ve granted me this day.  I look forward to whatever hours that remain for me, whether many or few.  It doesn’t matter the distance yet to go.  In the end, You will have accomplished in me whatever was Your plan and I will have truly lived every minute of it.  For that, I am indescribably grateful.  Grateful indeed…

From the Helm – Saturday, December 19, 2009

4:00 PM – Finally in for the afternoon.  Don’t have anything further planned for the day except maybe a movie at the Mall down the street.  For now, it’s good to be home for awhile with a good cup of coffee…

- We arrived in Manaus yesterday evening after the 34-hour trip down.  All went without a ripple (bags even arrived on the same plane with us this time).  Matthew and Phillip will head from here Monday night to be with Cida and William for the holidays.  Her family decided, at about the last minute, to pay their way down – it will be good for them all.  I’m grateful it all worked out.

It was good travelling with the Boys.  It’s a whole different world than it was when we’d ventured out like this 10 years ago.  They are fine young men today – good, easy company. 

- After sleeping for 10 hours, I had breakfast with Anderson to plan the day as best we could.  The thing we always agree on is to check off our list, slow and steady.  When it’s done, it’s done.  Always works pretty well that way.

After negotiating exchange rates with Ayobe and collecting some cash, we set out for the AMOR/Beatriz.   Carlinho picked us up at the dock and took us aboard.  Our “lady” was a sight for these old eyes to behold – She is beautiful.  Luiza, Denilson, and Carlinho were busy tending to the details that bring a vessel to life after an extended sit.  She should be ready for fueling and provisions by Wednesday.  I told Luiza to head back to Parintins to be with her family when the deal is done.  I’ll move aboard Thursday to take her place for the duration.

- All is well.  I’m rested and ready for the hours God may have for me these next days.  I couldn’t have placed myself in a better place and time than right here and now.  Thank You, Lord, for it all…

AMOR Trip Line - 2009 Link

http://list.amor-brazil.org/tripline/

From the Helm – Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Well, I’ve just made up my final, “final to-do list” in preparation for Thursday morning’s departure for the Valley.  The AMOR/Beatriz is being readied for sail; Luiza is on her way to oversee the provisioning and legalities.  My adrenaline is beginning to stir at a quickened pace.  It’s about time to watch the days unfold from a different vantage point.  I love it all, indeed…

From the Helm will pick up from Manaus and beyond, beginning around Saturday the 19^th.  I look forward to all God has prepared for the days to come.  I’m grateful for this privilege He’s granted me.  I look forward to sharing it all with those He places in my path…

The AMOR Trip Line – 2009 is about to be mailed out.  For those who would like to get an early glance, just follow the link below:

http://list.amor-brazil/tripline/

If you have a friend who would like to follow along as we travel, just send them the below link so they may receive From the Helm directly:

Subscribe to:

“From the Helm”

http://list.amor-brazil.org/mailman/listinfo/amor-announce

* Follow the above link, enter your e-mail address, select a password and automatically receive updates from the Valley and elsewhere… *

From the Helm – Sunday, November 15, 2009

- The AMOR/Lori is well on her way back to water.  I’m hoping she will be in operation by Christmas.

- The trips for December and January are set to go.  I will be headed down on December 18^th to oversee the preparations.  We still have some room if anyone feeing led to join.  We need to know soon so that documentation may be completed for entry in to the Reservation. This is a highly restricted area… The first of our teams will arrive early on the 26^th.  I’m looking forward to all God has for us to see and experience as we cruise the waters of the Wai-Wai’s.  I look forward to the days leading up to the days, as well.

- Due to scheduling problems (mostly me), our annual AMOR meeting in Kentucky will not take place until late January, 2010.  I am now working on our 2009 ANNUAL REPORT, to be printed and mailed prior to my December departure for the Valley.

 - This week, several people have come to me truly baffled by the circumstances of their lives.  This has caused me to more purposefully ponder the profound simplicity of God’s truths.  I’m grateful for these opportunities and the hope and assurance it produces in my own life.

Trials, challenges and difficulties.  To me, theses are all words used to define more a state of mind than things physical and tangible.  They reflect the result of my asking “why” instead of seeking wisdom, comfort and guidance through a time or event that has blindsided me.  To the question “why”, there is rarely a reasonably satisfactory answer anyway.

When I begin this questioning, I set in motion a strange and futile phenomenon - that of trying to assign responsibility and reason to things I fear or don’t fully understand.  This is fueled (and maybe even birthed) by my unwillingness to accept people, places and things as they are and naturally occur.  Add to this fuel the determination to fix or alter these elements to be rid of the said “trial”, I’ve created the perfect recipe for chaos, conflict and sustained misery in my own life.

Spiritual growth comes largely by means of these potentially troubling events and times in our lives.  Growth can come quickly, through accepting our inability to overcome and humbly seeking God’s will and strength in the matter. Or, the process can be lengthy in nature, producing unnecessary complications due to stubborn denial and rebellion (acts of our self-will).  The saddest scenario of all, however, is when we refuse to surrender, making growth impossible. This course of action leads to self-inflicted emotional and spiritual wounds that develop in to scarred character through the actions we take – a seemingly relentless cycle of insecurity, anger, hopelessness and remorse.

For many years, due to my own pride and ego, refusal to grow was the only option I’d left open to myself. I truly did suffer many trials and challenges, ultimately failing miserably at every turn. I took all things personally – any ripple in my stream of things was viewed as a threat.  Acting as author of my own peace of mind, I invariably found none at all. 

A moment of clarity God granted me some years ago was the beginning of life as I know it today.  In a moment, I profoundly understood that I was helpless in this world and in life itself.  I was incapable of producing anything to insure my physical, spiritual and emotional survival.  It was at that moment I asked of God the only thing He ever required of me, “God, help me…” 

All any of us need do in order to begin life is seek the God who created it all and knows our fit in the mix.  In this initial, desperate act of helpless seeking comes the small amount of humility needed to accept His ways instead of our own, if only for the day. 

This continued seeking of His ways has led me to the greatest gift and “secret” of successful living I know – continued surrender leads to the peace of mind and spirit I’ve always desired.  Knowledge of His will for me and His available power to carry on in the direction He reveals is all I need and should desire.  If all I seek is His will for me, my actions will lead to His desired ends.  Anything else is but futility of thought and action.

Today, I crave His presence, care and comfort.  I live in His providence, grace and mercy.  I do this because I’ve come from the absence of such things and desire never to return to such a place.  Lord, I pray those who now find themselves overwhelmed by Your absence, will humbly seek You presence.  If I’m to be of any help in the matter, I stand ready.

You know, it’s funny the truths I’ve spent 6 or 7 hundred words elaborating on are simply stated in scripture in just 5 short words: “Seek and ye shall find”    What a deal, indeed…

From the Helm – Monday, November 02, 2009

I went to bed a bit bewildered last night.  The financial obligations and challenges facing AMOR right now came to my mind rather intensely.  This happens more and more frequently these days.  The work taking place through AMOR in the Valley is, without question, beautiful, formidable, ongoing and humbling to be part of.  The area that has always baffled me a bit is that of finances.  Funds generally come in for specific projects which are much needed and appreciated.  However, for the general operations required to administer our work, funding is sparse or much of the time, non-existent.

I ponder our finances as a matter of reality, not in questioning whether or not our work is or isn’t what God has directed us to do.  He has never failed to provide for our needs and, in turn, the needs of those who help provide for our needs.  I guess I just allow myself to become weary from time to time.  Maybe it’s an act of futility – Maybe it’s a call for me to seek other ways and means of operating.  I really don’t know the answer.  I just know I get tired and relish in self-pity until I’m embarrassed with myself enough to stop….

I ask for the prayers of those who follow our ministry.  Some days are just this way.  I have to walk through them with a greater awareness of my limitations and dependence upon Him.  Days that usually lead to greater ends than their beginnings seemed to promise…

The RBBI went beautifully last week.  There were 44 lay-pastors and Itinerates present.  They celebrated our 25^th Anniversary of the Institute.  I will post some pictures of the event over the next days.  I am grateful for the gift of a friend that made it all possible.  This person has made possible the last several RBBI’s.  I know God sees and rewards him in ways unimaginable.  It is because he seeks no reward at all that he will reap them, indeed.

The AMOR/Lori is still just under US$ 5,000.00 short of complete restoration.  She is now sitting in dry-dock awaiting these funds to finish her.  She will then be set for another 10 years (or ten minutes, as He so designates) of service.  I look forward to seeing and traveling with her in December.

This morning came in beautiful fashion.  The moon was setting behind the trees in my back yard - Orion’s Belt, high and bright.  Thank You, Lord, for allowing me to gaze upon such things.  Thank You for new beginnings each morning.  Thank You for the comfort and peace You give me in all areas of this life I choose to relinquish to Your care and administration.  Thank You for your provision, even when I momentarily question its certainty.  I love You with all that I am…

From the Helm – Friday, October 23, 2009

The AMOR/Lori is still in the “process” of recuperation.  We were a bit under in our estimations of costs.  We are still about US$ 4,700.00 short due to some fiber-glassing and additional siding that must be repaired.  So, if you were planning on helping and felt (due to my last email) it was already taken care of, please send your check today.

RBBI has their opening ceremony this evening.  Everyone is excited.  The Amazonas pastors are already in Parintins with the Para teams arriving this afternoon.  Luiza is experiencing a relapse of pneumonia.  Please pray she takes the time to rest in the midst of hosting the RBBI.  She and Pedro are wonderful.  Please pray for them over the next week.

Our trips for December and January to the Wai-Wai Nation are set and ready to go.  There is still room for several to join.  However, the airfare is getting more expensive with each passing day.  If you would still like to join one of the teams, please contact me immediately.

I continue to be awed by God’s dealings in my life and the life of AMOR.  Especially in these recent times of challenge, He has continued to provide the direction, wisdom and provision needed to take the next step before us.  I’m grateful for the people He has place in my life.  The encouraging emails and phone calls have been a calming blessing. 

I’m grateful He’s allowed me to live as I live and do what I do.  I recognize how privileged I am to be able to see, touch and feel the places He’s graced me to explore and experience. How indescribably beautiful it is to serve the peoples of these remote places.  Thank You, Lord, for every moment of life You’ve given me.  Thank You for the comfort of knowing that any further moments that may remain are ours to live together, as You lead and I follow.  Thank You for it all…

From the Helm – Thursday, October 15, 2009

It’s been a good week thus far.  The AMOR/Lori is in various stages of disrepair and repair.  Pedro and Luiza are busy dealing with her in dry-dock as well as preparing for the RBBI scheduled to begin on the 23^rd of this month.  I’m grateful God placed this family in the life of AMOR and Paranorte.  They are dedicated, persistent and consistent.  A rare blessing, indeed.

Regarding our trips planned for December and January, we still have need of the following volunteers:

December 27 – January 07 Trip

Medical, Construction and VBS (total of 4 spaces)

January 11 - 21 Trip  

Medical and Construction (total of 4 spaces)

Please contact us as soon as possible if you feel led to join us.  Space on the airlines is critical at this point.  Several have expressed an interest but have not yet made the commitment.  I encourage you to do so now if God so leads.  If you have any specific questions or concerns, please ask!

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Email: boyd@amor-brazil.org

Boyd’s Cell: 870-656-0089

From the Helm – Monday, October 12, 2009

The week just past was one of tremendous blessing for me, personally, and for AMOR.  Many people have responded to the plight of the AMOR/Lori.  Enough has already been received to not only allow for her recuperation but, also, to continue with our plans for the upcoming RBBI.  While the wheels seemed to be falling off the wagon, actually everything was falling in to place in a most beautiful way. 

For many years I had difficulty asking anyone for help of any kind.  Of course I realize this difficulty was rooted in pride and ego.  I often found it easier to “suffer” through things rather than seek the wisdom and resources of others – secretly hoping someone would wake up and fix everything for me in the process (the folly of self-declared martyrdom…). This isn’t the best way to go about life. 

I’m truly grateful for God’s provision over the past days.  I’m grateful for His moving in the lives of dear friends to meet the challenges we’ve together faced.  It has been yet another lesson in trusting in God’s mercy, grace and guidance.  I needn’t question His faithfulness.  It’s a given…

________________________________________________________________________

I’ve been a bit saddened over the past couple weeks as well.  I’ve watched as human nature has won battles at turning points for several I know.  You see, it’s in our nature to seek self-preservation.  The problem is in where and to what extent we tend to seek this salvation from our circumstances. 

The easier, softer answer is to depend on God to lead us while asking only for clarity of direction, divorced from self-will and self-interest.  However, our most frequently adopted resolution is to barrel on ahead to disastrous ends for us and those around us.

We all come to turning points and crossroads along life’s course.  How we perceive these situations will determine our success through the fogs and mazes that necessarily confront us.  Much is said about “pride” in Scripture – none of the references are very affirmative.  However, in spite of all the history available to us, we seem to think it doesn’t apply to our particular, peculiar circumstances.

When circumstances become overwhelming, we tend to obscure the obvious call to surrender in favor of the spirit of fight.  In my own case, fight was never the right choice.  This largely due to the fact I’d become overwhelmed by my own best efforts in a matter.  I’d sought to force an issue based of power and control – neither of which I’ve ever processed, much less mastered.

The great paradox of surrender to God’s will in order to achieve peace and livability is always the answer.  This is an absolute truth that never varies in its simplicity and result.  Those of us who desire life, as He has it for us to live, will always retreat to the comfort of surrender – for this, we know, is where life begins. 

No matter how far we’ve ventured down the road of self-centeredness, egotism, etc., as long as there is still breathe within us, there is still time to stop the insanity.  There is always that moment we may choose to stop fighting and know God is exactly who He says He is.  At this point, another paradox comes to view – When we give up what we’ve always thought to be the source of our worth and security, yielding to whatever God may have for us around the next bend, we find that what He reveals to us is what we’ve wanted all along…

My life was once an ever increasing cycle of attempted control, manipulation and arrogance.  I was able to author a world of harm done to others for the sake of what I felt was right for me and them.  By God’s grace and mercy, I was able to see the futility of the whole deal – I was able to see that I, not the world, was wrong.  The world was my victim, not I the victim of the world.

So, all I’m able to do these days is pray for and be available to my friends in tight spots.  I know from experience it takes a touch from God to awaken a heart to change.  No word from me could ever influence change on such a fundamental level – for this, I am truly relieved and grateful – grateful indeed…

Thank You, Lord, for these days You’ve graced me with.  Thank You for the peace You’ve allowed me to feel is such overwhelming proportions.  Thank You for the privilege of seeking You.  Thank You for the All that You are to me…

From the Helm – Tuesday, October 06, 2009 - (Update on the AMOR/Lori)

It has been an eventful 8 days since the Lori took on water.  I am grateful for all the emails expressing concern and prayer support.  I am grateful for all who have said they will help in some way.  It will be a blessing when the help actually arrives.

The Lori is on land.  The repairs will involve approximately 50% of her hull along with the shaft tunnel, some siding and full paint.  Her engine has been torn down and was being re-assembled today.  The generators are next in line.

I’m grateful to have Pedro and his family onsite.  Luiza is in Manaus handling some business relating to the AMOR/Beatriz and Missao Paranorte.  She will return to Parintins later this week.

I’m attaching a few photos.  Maybe this time they will actually make it…  Thank you again for your continue support of the work in the Valley.  The AMOR/Lori should be ready to cruise again soon.  I look forward to seeing her all dressed up and new again.

God has been gracious in His dealings over the past days.  I look forward to the days ahead as my mind and heart become better able to digest the width and depth of it all...

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Link to AMOR/Lori Photos.

http://list.amor-brazil.org/lori/

From the Helm – Tuesday, September 29, 2009

As I was leaving the house last night, I received word that the AMOR/Lori had sunk in port.  I have few details at the moment other than her engine and generators were completely submerged during the event.  No one was injured.  Pedro, Luiza and the crews of surrounding vessels worked all afternoon to save her.  She went down anyway.  Just a catastrophic event we will know more about as this day unfolds.

She will be raised and dry-docked today.  Damages will be accessed.  Repairs will be scheduled.

We had planned to pull her when funds become available in January.  I guess these “plans” have been bumped up a bit.  More details to come. 

All is well.  All things work for good.  I’m grateful to know this to be true, without a doubt…

Hey there. 
 
I thank all who have responded with interest in our trips to the Wai-Wai Indian Nation.  As it stands now, we still need several to minister in the areas of medical, teaching and water system installation.  The needs are as follows:
 
Medical - Physicians, Nurses, PA's - First and Second trip
 
Bible Teachers - Second trip
 
Dental - First trip

VBS - First trip
 
Construction - First and Second trip
 
We are still working on the airfare quotes.  Please allow us another week to get that all arranged.  I will contact you as soon as I know the math.
 
I am attaching the original letter for your review.  Even if you have already responded and confirmed you will be joining us, please reply again so we may begin to solidify our plans, ok?

___________________________________________________________________________________________

Hey All. 

Just wanted to make everyone aware of a unique opportunity on the horizon.  Many have expressed an interest in joining me in the Wai-Wai Nation whenever we next travelled to that region.  Well, the time for such a trip is now approaching.

The situation that has been on my heart and mind involves medical, dental, Bible teaching, VBS and the laying a water system - All in the community of Inaja.

Due to the logistics, we will need to take two separate teams of 12 volunteers each.  The first team would concentrate more on the medical, VBS and teaching.  The second will lean more toward VBS, teaching and construction.

Due to the level of difficulty involved with transportation, special circumstances and limited numbers, the cost to each individual will be US$ 2,580.00, plus airfare.  There will be an additional commuter flight from Manaus to Parintins.  This will get us about 24 hours closer to our starting destination of Cachoeira Porteira, allowing for two additional days on location.

The trip will be different from most you have been on.  For starters, it involves two days travel aboard open Indian dugouts, negotiating falls and rapids all the way.  Our accommodations on location will be adequate but, as of yet, undetermined.  We will have our own chef as well as essential interpreters and staff.  However, it will be much different than life aboard the AMOR/Beatriz…

The dates for the trips are as follows:

1^st Team – December 28 – January 07, 2010

2^nd Team – January 11 – 21, 2010

Well, there is the opportunity available to the few who will be able to join me.  Please pray about the whole thing, seeking clarity as God chooses to reveal.  I look forward to hearing from each who may feel this is what God may have in mind for your Christmas and New Year’s.

Call or email me if you would seriously consider this special blessing over the holidays.  As always, let me know how I may be of service.  May you continue to be teachable as God leads in the days ahead.

From the Helm – Tuesday, September 15, 2009

4:45 AM - The trips for December and January seem to finally be coming together.  There is still a need for people to lay the water system in Inaja as well as a doctor and several Bible teachers.  I trust God will touch the hearts of those He desires to fill these gaps.  I’ve express the desire in my heart to go.  The touching of hearts to join me is entirely up to Him.

- Over the past couple weeks, God has dealt gently and subtly with my heart and mind. 

I’ve sought His presence more determinedly due to the acute awareness that I’d been seeking my own solutions to situations, with remarkable ease. This ease of self-justification based on “intuitive thought” is best left to those with better thought processes than mine – of this I am certain…

At times, I tend to get comfortable with the fact that I’m just where I need to be in my relationship to You, Lord.  I get comfortable knowing I am but following Your lead.  Ironically, this comfort often leads me to seek You less.  This, in turn, leads to less conscious dependence, which leads to subtle anxieties.  Anxiety leads to unguided thought, which in turn, leads to erratic action.  When left unchecked, this scenario invariably produces a less than desirable result.

I’ve come to believe that knowledge of God’s will for our lives is paramount to peace of mind and usefulness to Him. Last week I was blessed to take part of a number of discussions on the subject. The result for me was beautiful indeed.

In reflecting on such matters, I must reduce the equation to its simplest form.  God’s granted me just enough thinking capacity to recognize the basics and just enough sense to realize when I’m complicating the simplicity of these basics.

The common thread of the conversations was the age-old question of “How do I know God’s will for my life?”  For me, the answer to this question is simple:  I’ll not see clearly His will in any situation as long as I retain my own will in the equation.  The answer to removing my will is conscious, continuous surrender.  I must change the way I see the challenges placed before me.  I must trust He will show me what I need to see and reveal the appropriate response (or, more often, lack of response) I should have.

For many years, I was under the impression that God’s revelation of Himself to me should be of the “lightning bolt” variety.  I would have to know it all, right then and there, if it were to be valid.  He would have to show me the future in order for me to trust Him with the present.  What He showed me had to at least come close to what I’d determine to be good for me or otherwise had in mind for myself.  I’d placed Him within the parameters of human thought and action – a place destined to keep me right where I was – Saved in the eternal sense. Lost in the living of life…

For many years I struggled needlessly with the idea of seeking God’s will. “Needlessly” because I really didn’t want to know His will at all.  I simply desired to justify my own actions and hope those actions would at least remotely look and sound good to those around me.  Fear, pride and ego kept me from the comfort and grace that seeking and obeying His will always produces.  For someone like me, surrender was not an option.  I’m grateful the day finally came when surrender became my only option.

So, surrender to Him is the answer to all questions of seeking His will for my life.  I’m grateful He shows me only what lies directly before me.  I’m grateful He only requires action regarding the things He reveals and in the manner and to the measure He reveals.  To know His will for me, I need but be rid of my own.  Thank You, Lord, for Your consideration of me.  Thank You for the simplicity of what you require of me.  Thank You, Lord, indeed…

Hey All. 

Just wanted to make everyone aware of a unique opportunity on the horizon.  Many have expressed an interest in joining me in the Wai-Wai Nation whenever we next travelled to that region.  Well, the time for such a trip is now approaching.

The situation that has been on my heart and mind involves medical, dental, Bible teaching, VBS and the laying a water system - All in the community of Inaja.

Due to the logistics, we will need to take two separate teams of 12 volunteers each.  The first team would concentrate more on the medical, VBS and teaching.  The second will lean more toward VBS, teaching and construction.

Due to the level of difficulty involved with transportation, special circumstances and limited numbers, the cost to each individual will be US$ 2,580.00, plus airfare.  There will be an additional commuter flight from Manaus to Parintins.  This will get us about 24 hours closer to our starting destination of Cachoeira Porteira, allowing for two additional days on location.

The trip will be different from most you have been on.  For starters, it involves two days travel aboard open Indian dugouts, negotiating falls and rapids all the way.  Our accommodations on location will be adequate but, as of yet, undetermined.  We will have our own chef as well as essential interpreters and staff.  However, it will be much different than life aboard the AMOR/Beatriz…

The dates for the trips are as follows:

1^st Team – December 28 – January 07, 2010

2^nd Team – January 11 – 21, 2010

Well, there is the opportunity available to the few who will be able to join me.  Please pray about the whole thing, seeking clarity as God chooses to reveal.  I look forward to hearing from each who may feel this is what God may have in mind for your Christmas and New Year’s.

Call or email me if you would seriously consider this special blessing over the holidays.  As always, let me know how I may be of service.  May you continue to be teachable as God leads in the days ahead.

From the Helm – Friday, August 28, 2009

3:20 AM - I’ve been back in the USA for 3 weeks now.  Yesterday, I was schedule to leave for the Valley to complete preparations for our final trip of the season.  The trip will no longer take place as planned and prepared for, leading to several unusual circumstances in the life of AMOR.  All, surmountable.  All, ultimately positive.  All is well.

- Lord, these have been interesting days You’ve gifted me with.  I’ve had the opportunity to observe the victory of human instinct over things of the spirit – sadly watching opportunities to serve being overwhelmed by earthly wisdom and the concerns of the flesh.  This sometimes seems to happen with frightening ease when personal motivation is unleashed in the absence of simple, earnest self-appraisal.  I stand guilty of such more times than I’d care to acknowledge, making self-appraisal of even greater necessity in my own life.

You’ve taught me much this week that will become clearer as the coming days and weeks unfold.  One old, yet timeless insight has been refreshing:  When limited by the bounds of human wisdom and logic, we act and react in predictable ways.  My only control in the deal is to continually strive for acceptance of this ever present truth.  More often than not, people will act as people will act.  I’m aware of this via the absolute recognition of the trait within my own being.  When left solely to my own ingenious devices, less than desirable outcomes usually result.

- These days, Lord, You’ve allowed me opportunities to seek Your guidance and clear direction at new levels.  You’ve allowed me the privilege of a higher dependence that has led to a greater comfort and peace in my soul.  I’m grateful for all that has transpired. Your ways are beautiful to me.  I welcome and humbly await the wisdom that will certainly come of it all.  Things are just as they are meant to be.  Your Grace, Wisdom and Provision are, as always, fully sufficient – fully sufficient, indeed…

- The Boys are back in the full swing of sports, school and relationships (or lack of).  It’s been good to watch as they’ve sought out their niche in it all.  Mom and Dad are physically well.  No great challenges at the moment.  I’ve enjoyed the close proximity to them, meeting daily for coffee, conversation, etc.  It’s a privilege God has given us as a family for the several months we’re able to be together like this.  This privilege is one I am intensely aware of and truly grateful for.  Few have such an opportunity…

- I returned Sunday evening from a weekend in Louisville, Kentucky.  We had a reunion gathering at the Wheeler’s home for the team members from over the years.  I saw so many friends that I’ve not seen in a good while.  The fellowship was beautiful.  The drive to and from served well to clear and settle my mind.  Lord, You’ve been gracious to place people in my life who are genuine.  Everywhere You’ve allow me to trudge, there You’ve placed those to be loved and those to be loved by.  I am overwhelmed by Your mercy and grace in this area.  Thank You for Your consideration of me in this way.  Thank You, indeed…

- Well, this day is about to dawn.  In a couple of hours, it will bring light to new opportunities.  I look forward to all that will be revealed.  I have the feeling that by the time I lay my head down this evening, it will have been a day, indeed…

From the Helm – Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Been home a week, today.  Still in the process of seeing where the dust has settled.  It’s been a slow process.

It seems almost surreal as I’ve walked through these days.  There’ve been some changes all around and yet, all remains the same.  It’s made me aware of how fortunate I am to have been able to step away to a different place with a different set of circumstances for a while – to know there’s another world beyond my own petty needs and wants.

- I’m grateful God has allowed me what He’s allowed me.  Through any difficulties, He’s been faithful to provide peace and contentment.  Through all the little thrills along the way, He’s reminded me to be appreciative of such moments.  He’s truly what He says He is.  Dependant upon my seeking His will for each step I take, He’s the answer to any doubt that may arise along the way.  I’m grateful there’s absolutely nothing I must figure out on my own.

- This has been a blessed summer.  The trips were phenomenal – the people I was blessed to meet along the way, inspiring.  We were able to travel new waters, resulting in new relationships in the Valley – Relationships that have enriched my life and humbled my soul.  I’m grateful for it all.

-  The Alabama team has cancelled their September departure.  Although it’s somewhat disappointing, I know the reasons for my calendar being so cleared will become obvious as the days unfold.  When the time comes for us to explore the Araria River, we will do so.  For now, I know God has other plans of which I need no immediate clues – just knowledge of today’s deal will suffice…

- The way it looks now, my schedule is rather full over the next weeks.  Finances are rather thready.  I look to God’s direction along these lines.  Many have contributed in beautiful ways; others have found it not possible to participate.  I know things are just the way they should be – I’ve done what I’ve felt led to do along these lines.  I make myself available to His leading to do anything, anywhere.  There are no mountains to climb and no depths to endure – just the walk along the way as He reveals the path.

It’s good to be home.  The Boys are enjoying the company of their more delicate counterparts.  It’s been fun to see the sparkles in their collective eyes.  I know they’re also grateful their mother’s here for awhile.  She’ll keep things a bit more livable around this old bachelor’s pad of ours.

Well, this Thursday has dawned.  I look forward to the hours as they unfold.  I look forward to it all, indeed…

From the Helm – Monday, August 03, 2009 (cont…)

3:00 PM – Well, it’s been an eventful cruise thus far.  We left Maues on schedule.  My meeting with Edno and Abraao went well.  They are set, fueled and cashed up for the September trip.

- The younger girls have been laying out upstairs.  All our single crewmen have been unusually attentive to their needs and safety.  Such concern for human life…

- I had my nails done for the trip home – feels so very good. The guys back in the USA have no idea what they’re missing by passing up such a treatment. Truly feels good to be pampered on occasion.

- A few minutes ago, Amadeu cut his finger quite badly in the kitchen.  Scott is sewing him up in the pharmacy.  Looks like a tendon and artery were both severed.  God will see them through the deal.  I’m grateful I’m not the only one here.  This is best left for someone who’s better up for the task.  I’m grateful Scott’s here, indeed…

5:00 PM - The Lori just pulled up along side for tow.  She’s getting air and vapor locks in her the main engine.  It’s time to re-vamp her for further service – aluminum fuel tanks, pre-filter system, etc.  She’s a doll. Like any lady, she just needs some long overdue TLC...

From the Helm – Tuesday, August 04, 2009

2:00 PM – We just arrived at the Floating Mall across from Manaus.  The group is out shopping till they drop. Then, off on a little jungle tour to cap off the day.  They’re all planning to spend the evening at the Mall in Manaus after dinner.  I’ll just stay put on the Beatriz.

- We travel tomorrow afternoon for Miami.  Just one more night aboard my baby, Beatriz.

- It’s time to go home.  It’s been a truly beautiful season.  God has blessed beyond measure in every imaginable way.  He has been faithful through His providence, grace, mercy and guidance.  I know He will continue to reveal to me things I’ve missed along

From the Helm – Monday, August 03, 2009

5:30 AM – The engines of the Beatriz and Lori just fired up.  We’re underway toward home.  After a quick stop in Maues to drop Tereza off, we’ll set out course for Manaus.  ETA is set for around Noon, tomorrow.

I look forward to the journey up-stream. The conversation is always good…

From the Helm will continue as thoughts and events warrant.  Otherwise, not…